planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
