id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
