Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
