; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Randomize
