Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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