wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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