this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
bring money and cleavage
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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