oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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