I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize