i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
