Whoa Z and x make the same sound
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
