How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
