Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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