I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
