I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize