You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
