porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
