I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
