wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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