would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
