is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
