Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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