I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
