my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Bang-toberfest begins!!
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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