lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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