I got chris browned last night
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
