Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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