a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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