we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize