so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
