If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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