Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize