butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
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