My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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