I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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