I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
