I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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