Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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