I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize