I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i just made my gag reflex go away.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
