dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
