i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
