maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
