Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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