So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
What a dumb baby whore.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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