Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
The Olympian is in my bed
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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