Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
are you so shy because you have an std?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
