i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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