Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
