You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
