But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
