It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
