oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
