i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize